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Keyboard-Based Development
Our senior engineer uses a proprietary four-paw input method with occasional tail-assisted refactoring.
commit 8f31c9
fix: knocked coffee away from laptop
fix: knocked coffee away from laptop
Feline software laboratory
My Cats Code.
A completely legitimate research project exploring the ancient question: if a cat walks across a keyboard long enough, will it eventually deploy a web app? Early results are promising. Documentation remains covered in fur.
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Agile-ish Workflow
Tasks are moved from “To Do” to “In Progress” to “Nap.” Sprint planning usually ends under a warm monitor.
velocity: 3 zoomies/hour
uptime: depends on sunbeam
uptime: depends on sunbeam
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Bug Management
Every bug is carefully inspected, stared at, lightly slapped, and occasionally eaten. QA has never been more literal.
bugs found: 12
bugs remaining: 0*
*unverified
bugs remaining: 0*
*unverified
Current Research Projects
Important work. Questionable methods.
Our laboratory is dedicated to advancing humanity's understanding of feline-assisted software engineering. Funding remains nonexistent, but morale is high whenever the treat drawer opens.
RESEARCH 001
Project CATGPT
Determining whether sitting directly on a keyboard improves code quality. Preliminary findings show a 900% increase in characters per minute and a troubling decline in spaces.
RESEARCH 002
The Red Dot Problem
Fourteen months of intensive research. Hundreds of pursuit attempts. The red dot remains uncaught. The team suspects advanced optical countermeasures.
RESEARCH 003
Box Model Research
CSS has a box model. Cats also have a box model. If a box exists, the cat must fit inside it regardless of documented width, height, padding, or common sense.
RESEARCH 004
Mouse Compatibility Testing
Results remain inconclusive because test subjects repeatedly knock the mouse off the desk before diagnostics can be completed.
RESEARCH 005
Infinite Monkey Theorem: Cat Edition
Significantly fewer Shakespeare plays than predicted. Surprisingly more ssssssssssssssssssss. Statistical analysis is ongoing.
RESEARCH 006
Production Warmth Optimization
Investigating why the exact laptop needed for an urgent deployment is consistently identified as the warmest and therefore best possible place to sleep.
Our Methodology
The Feline Development Lifecycle™
A rigorous six-stage engineering process refined through years of observation, scratched furniture, unexplained commits, and meetings nobody attended.
Requirements
Human explains what the software needs to do. Cat ignores human.
Development
Cat walks across keyboard. Several new dependencies mysteriously appear.
Code Review
Second cat stares at monitor for eleven minutes, then leaves without comment.
Quality Assurance
Mouse is located and aggressively tested. Mouse eventually leaves the desk.
Deployment
Cat steps on Enter. Nobody is entirely sure which environment was selected.
Production Monitoring
Everybody takes a nap. If nobody wakes up, uptime is assumed to be 100%.
Peer Reviewed? Absolutely.
Unfortunately, all of our peers are also cats.
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What exactly is My Cats Code? Mostly an excuse for this domain to resolve somewhere entertaining. No marketplace. No game codes. No crypto.
No revolutionary startup pitch. Just cats, code jokes, and a server that now has something better to say than “default site.”
PS. We do not own the domain that brought you here. Whoever does left it pointing to our server.
PS. We do not own the domain that brought you here. Whoever does left it pointing to our server.